Sunday, February 13, 2011

here

I have not even clicked on this blog since November, seems unreal to me. A place that brought me such comfort and love became a place where I started to stop being real...I am and I know it, to sensitive. While I may say that I'm past things and that the small amount of single minded critics don't hurt me....well that would be a lie. It does hurt. It makes me want to drag them in to my world, Kyle's world...separate them from their home, their lives, their loves....and force them to stay up for days at a time watching their child fight for life. My hurt side wants that, my heart is grateful that they will never know my pain. If I have learned things from all of this.....never, ever judge anyone. Ever. Until you walk in their shoes....live their life....hurt the way they do....
I'm done with that....I miss my blogging...I'm ashamed that I stayed away so long. So on to the update.

The last few months have been tough....Kyle's present condition is hard. His health is not well and we are concerned. His stomach is literally covered with tubes, bags, and wounds. His mental health, our Kyle....glimpses of our Kyle....are few and far between. There is no handbook here, as his parents we are trying our best to help him....he's been thru to much. His body and mind need rest....which is what we are trying to give him. The next few weeks will be full of rest and I hope hospital free, his mind needs that. Here he feels safe....and while his daily wound and bag changes are painful for him he knows that I am doing what I need to do to keep him safe and here with me. So I hope your back with us. We need you... Tomorrow I will update with where we stand as far as Kyle's feeds.

XO
K

26 comments:

Robin said...

Always praying and thinking of you all! XOXO

Anonymous said...

Katie, we are always with you ALL, whether you are silent or blogging. We all love you. I think about you every day. Carol.

girlyhurley said...

I've missed your blogging... It's been four years and it's strange how blogs like yours are such a part of my life. I think you get it, while others don't. We pray for you and your family on a regular basis. I hope your family gets the time home together you need and that Kyle gets to be normal for awhile. Hugs to you!

L

Kathy said...

I've been following your blog for not much time. My daughter was recently diagnosed with mito at 19 months old. I respect your courage and am so sorry for the pain you go through for being judged and watching your son and your family fight so hard for what many take for granted...life. We are with you in this...I just wanted you to know. You can look me up on facebook Kathy Bailey Lower or visit Delaney's carepage at www.carepages.com/carepages/delaneylower

Lauren said...

Oh Kate. We never left.

All our love to you-
Lauren

Karri said...

I think Lauren said it best.....we never left.
We are here for support in any and all ways possible.

My prayers have been and will remain for Kyle's physical comfort. And for peace in all of your hearts. I will also pray that home is where you can stay.

Love and hugs!
- Karri

Debbie said...

Glad your back...you and your family have our support, love and prayers!

Tommie said...

Kate,

I'm sorry that people have hurt you. I'm sorry that Kyle is still hurting, both physically and mentally.

Like Lauren said, we never left. We're still here when you need us, when you don't. Just here, hoping and praying for you all.

Mel said...

Always with you...always on our mind...always praying....always loving...always hoping...always inspired by the strength you all have! XOXOXO Mel & Family

Shari said...

I am so sorry there are those that judge! :( Don't be ashamed for staying away Kate. You were protecting yourself.

I am always thinking and praying for your sweet Kyle. I wear my shirt weekly to remind myself there is a special little boy on the other side of the country who is fighting for his life.

Much love!

xoxo

another mother said...

I've checked back every couple days and followed the facebook page to keep up with Kyle's health. I wish there were words to bring comfort but there are not. Just know that Kyle is being held in the thoughts and prayers of so many.

The Phamily Matriarch said...

Here through it all.

xoxo
Bug

Jackie said...

Dang it! All the Share peeps stole my line. :P

We've been here all along and we'll continue to be here, because you and Kyle are a part of our lives.

I hope the next few weeks are quiet and bring the peace that you need.

Hugs,
Jackie

gg said...

Glad to see you back...people can be so cruel.

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy to see this update!! Give the little fighter a hug for me! I'm always thinking of ya'll.

~Tracy

Unknown said...

That was a beautiful post. I'm so sorry you felt that way. I hope the number of positive people with love and compassion outweighs the negative. I've missed your blogging.
Best wishes,
Laura

Anonymous said...

Ahhh bless your heart. I'm so sorry for what you and Kyle have been through. I'm so happy to see you blogging because I have been very worried even though I do not know you at all.
Blair

Kira Gartner said...

I just can't imagine anyone who would wish you and your family anything but good wishes and love! Thank you for the update, and I hope that Kyle gets the rest that he needs. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Kris said...

Prayers continue for Kyle and your whole family.

Unknown said...

Mel said it all...always in our hearts

Michelle and Sean said...

I know it can be hurtful when people post a comment without thinking. I also have a hard time not letting things bother me.

Just know that there are so many people that do know and understand some of what you may be going through. And there are people that may not get it at all but they love your family and Kyle so much. You will always have support from the people that care about you!!

We continue to keep Kyle and your family in our prayers.

Kara said...

I'm glad you're back! I'm sorry cruel people have hurt you but know there are many more people out there that care for you and your family. I can't even fathom what it takes to be Kyle's mom, but God gave YOU that job because He knew you had what it takes and you are doing it to the best of your ability, which if far better than anyone else because you know your son and have his best interests at heart. Praying for you guys!

MJ said...

I have checked in regularly, thinking of you and your family and praying for you all.

It is heartbreaking to think that people have treated you badly. For what it is worth, I admire your courage and love more than I can say. You inspire me.

Anonymous said...

Always thinking of you, your family and your precious boy. Though we have never met I always have you in my thoughts and prayers. A day never passes that I don't think of Kyle and his family.

Sharlene said...

You can't get rid of us by not blogging....I think we all proved that!! Here for you come what may, no matter what, judge free, full of love, prayers, and support for you and your family!!!

You're stuck with us!! LOL!!

Keeping Kyle in continued prayer!!
XOXO

Anonymous said...

Your family is always in my thoughts. Best Wishes